Under all the masks
by Captaindrake123
Summary: Why is Haruno Yukinoshita so manipulative? What does she hope to gain? It's hard to tell with all the facades she puts on, but when you take them all off...it's not as bad as you thought, yet it's not good either.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Oregairu!

* * *

My name is Haruno Yukinoshita.

Most people see me as the beautiful daughter to the rich Yukinoshita family. Charming, smart, social, and full of energy.

It's all a lie...well, except for the 'being rich' part.

The personality I display for others is just a show, a way to keep up the good image of the Yukinoshita family.

But if it's a fake, what's my real personality like?

If you were to ask a certain three club mates, you would probably get responses like these:

"Nosey"

"Erm...she's kind of scary"

"Demon super woman"

The last one was what I imagined to be the response of a certain dead-fish eyed loner, it was how I wanted to be seen by them after all.

That's right, that 'manipulative' and 'relationship meddling' personality is also another one of my many facades.

But why would I act like that to them? Just to watch them squirm? ...sort of. It's a bit more complicated than that.

I don't do it for enjoyment, in fact, I internally cringe at every sentence I make when I put this façade up. But it's not nearly as bad as the certain three teens make it out to be. Teenagers always make a bigger deal of labels than most adults do...well, adults do it too, but not to such eccentricities.

'Prince of Sobu High'

'Ice Queen'

'Fire Queen'

The higher up and feared titles, then there's the lower ones like:

'Loner'

'Otaku'

'Nerd'

'Jocks'

'Cheerleaders'

And so on. They always make it seem grand, like they were what completely defined a person and that's how they would always be seen.

Point being, all I have been doing so far is give my sister and her friends a few embarrassing situations. That's it. I haven't done anything notably eccentric.

In other words 'Not interesting'

Yet they avoid me like the plague, when they see me they give fearful glances to each other as if I'm going to end the world. But I suppose I can't blame them...

So what's the point in this charade then? A very good question, one that would need more illumination on my past to be answered properly. It wasn't anything...traumatic I suppose, but it wasn't pleasant either.

You see, as the daughter of the Yukinoshita family I am suppose to uphold certain standards so our family is viewed well by society. Balls, dances, speeches, meetings, all of which I must put up a _fake_ smile, a _fake_ friendly wave, and _fake_ laughter at an important person's jokes.

At some point...I couldn't figure out what my real personality was like. I faked everything about myself every single day, just for the appeasement of my parents and society.

I **_hated_** it.

There was nothing I could do about it though, this was my life as the heir of the Yukinoshita's title.

But at the very least, I had a cute little sister I loved that would never go through what I had.

We weren't always so distant, in fact at one point I thought we were pretty close...but I noticed how she always clung to me, and copied what I did. At first I didn't give it much thought, I was her idol, it was natural for a kid to try to emulate their idols.

But it wouldn't stop...she always tried to hold herself the same way I did...the same way the **_fake_** me did. All the way up until middle school.

One day, Yukino came home crying her eyes out. Hayama, who she thought to be her friend, instead of helping my little sister against the bullies he decided to appease the masses instead. Like a coward he was too afraid to take her side, and it cost their friendship.

I was planning on comforting her like I wanted to...but then I heard the noise from the piano.

She was playing the same song on the piano I play when I'm upset.

After the years of having her copy me, idolizing me...it finally clicked. She was trying to become _exactly_ like me. It's not that 'cute' kind of copying...it was borderline obsessive.

Even when she was having probably one of the worst days of her life, she was trying to be like me.

I don't want her to end up like me...that was terrifying.

Have her put up the same fake smile I do?

Never be able to state your real opinion?

Make nice with someone you don't even like, everyday? Just for some political gain?

Fake your personality so much that you don't even know what you're real one is like anymore?

And so forth, I made a knew façade. Not for my parents, not for society, but for my sister. It would be hard at first, but eventually she'll become her own person.

And she did.

But if it were that easy I wouldn't be going through the trouble, would I? No, she still has her own problems she needs to solve, problems that need a push.

Her relationships for example, she was never very good at making friends, _real_ friends. It's one of the reasons why I'm so interested in Hikigaya Hachiman, he has just as many problems as my little sister (if not more). He easily saw through the façade I put on for show, which impressed me, and I think he's on to my real intentions as of recently.

But back to the point, Yukino needed a push to fix her problems, so I became that push by becoming a problem.

It probably sounds counterproductive, but the fact of the matter is that humans _**thrive**_ on conflict. By putting her in the situations I have, it's made her, Hikigaya, and Yuigahama express their problems at some point later on. Their relationships only getting stronger, with me as the common enemy.

Someone that played the villain in all of their stories.

...so what is my real personality like?

I have no idea, all I know is that I care about my little sister.

I'd laugh at how similar this method is to a certain dead-fish eyed loner, another thing that interested me about him. Like me he always seemed to make himself out to be the villain to solve his problems, he uses lies to get the best results while hurting himself and the people around him.

Little did they know, the biggest liar of all...was me.

* * *

Captaindrake123: This is my take on what Haruno is really doing. She isn't some demon spawn from hell like so many stories make her out to be, she's human. Throughout the series there was always one constant about Haruno, she always bring herself into matters that concern her little sister.


	2. Chapter 2

I don't own Oregairu

* * *

 _"I love you!"_

Why am I remembering this now? Strange...

The human brain is a fascinating thing, it can be just as chaotic as it is useful. Random memories of your past that you haven't thought about for years can easily pop up from just the simplest of things.

But I suppose it isn't exactly 'random' per say, I am currently 'hanging out' with the said person who confessed to me all those years ago.

Of course, this was Hayama Hayato.

...now people would probably be jumping to conclusions if I told them that without any background. It's so easy to misinterpret what someone says, it so easy to lead to the wrong conclusion. If I would just tell someone straight up he confessed to me once, without mentioning the fact that he was ten at the time, they would immediately draw the wrong conclusion.

"Where would you like to go next, Haruno-san?" He gave me one of his superficial smiles, just to keep up the appearances for the masses around us. They probably see us some super couple, or whatever society would unjustly label us as.

 _'So damn fake, it's nauseating...'_ It might be hypocritical of me, but I really hate other people who act so superficial.

...scratch that, it's VERY hypocritical of me, but I don't really care.

 _'Actually, since I hate superficial people, wouldn't that mean I also hate myself?'_ Very good question, and it was far more interesting to ponder this than listen to the blonde, even if I technically already knew the answer to said question.

"Um...Haruno-san? Where do you want to go?"

"Oh!" I pretended to be embarrassed and surprised "I was lost in thought, I suppose we can go to the clothes department, no?" We were currently at the mall, and as much as I hate being around with this man, I have a specific goal in mind for this situation.

 _'But damn if it isn't so annoying'_ I internally sighed, a habit I've grown accustomed to. To relieve some of the emotional tension, without making physical actions, I usually imagine myself doing them instead (Or imagine beating up the person causing such frustrations). I can't exactly show off how I'm really feeling after all...

To be the villain, I have to show **_no_** weakness.

...well, no weakness to the people the act is intended for.

I am not infallible, no matter how good my 'perfect girl' façade is. I have emotions as any other human being like happiness, surprise, excitement, sadness, anger, and anxiety. There has been a rare few, but memorable, slips and cracks in my control.

For example: The time I utterly _crushed_ Hayama Hayato.

At that time I wasn't 'Miss perfect Yukinoshita', I was the rampaging 'PISSED OFF SISTER!'

 _'I say that, but it wasn't just for Yukino was it...?'_ I think to myself as Hayama-kun followed obediently.

To be honest, I hate Hayama Hayato for another reason...one that is purely selfish, and completely unfair of me. It is not logical, it is emotional and hypocritical.

He is just like me.

Born into a rich family, his parents already predetermined him to be the successor. A perfect boy all round, everyone is friends with Hayama Hayato, he makes no mistakes, he is handsome, he's always kind, he is perfect, perfect, perfect!

Just. Like. Me.

Whenever I look at him, I see another me. Even how he hurt Yukino reminded me of my ways, I've walked over countless people, leaving behind the ones who stand in my way, and sacrificing others to be seen in a positive light by the majority.

I'm reminded of these facades I always put up, I'm reminded I have to be 'perfect'. It's sickening, he reminds me of everything I _**hate**_ about my life. It's as if the universe, god, or whatever is up there is slapping me in the face by showing what is basically my entire life **right in front of me** , mocking me, and getting pleasure out of my struggles.

So yeah, it's really selfish and unfair. But it's one of the few selfish and unfair things I have been able to do.

I hate Hayama Hayato, because whenever I'm with him I'm reminded how much I hate everything about myself. It's very stressful to be honest.

But, I have to deal with him in order for my act as the villain to work. At least I can show how I really feel to people like him and Hikigaya, because they've already seen through it, whether I let them or they found out on their own, doesn't matter, it's somewhat liberating when it's just them around.

Speaking of Hikigaya "Hikigaya-kun! Gahama-chan!" It's showtime.


	3. Author's Note

**Note From Author:**

Captaindrake123: Greetings from the United Federation of Pla-uh, I mean, Fanfiction forums...yeah.

CommanderCaleb: This was supposed to be a one-shot, but the author forgot to change it to 'complete', and then the reviews were saying: "Glad this isn't a one-shot" so it got real awkward fast.

Captaindrake123: WTF!? Why did you just drop the bomb like that!...*sigh* yeah that's basically it...but I'm not cancelling it.

CommanderCaleb:...huh?

Captaindrake123: Yeah, but it's not really gonna be an actual 'story' per say, I've got enough to deal with. I plan to make it a series of exploring Haruno's psyche, I may put her in different situations to show how I think she will react, or just plain out have her monologuing to you readers like I've done so far.

CommanderCaleb: But WHY though? Wasn't this an accident?

Captaindrake123: Yes it was an accident, but it's also an opportunity. This can be something I can do when I feel like getting into people's minds or being philosophical-when I just get in one of those moods. Soooo...

CommanderCaleb: So your gonna work on this when your bored?

Captaindrake123: Yep. So to all of you reading, thanks for going through this humble story, I am NOT cancelling it, just don't expect a full on storyline- I mean, you could ask, but don't think I'll just do it.


	4. Notice

Captaindrake123: Hello everyone, sorry this isn't an update but my family has been having some issues lately. My dad's in the hospital, just got kidney and heart surgery. So far its been going good, however things are gonna be tough for a while with recovery. So I won't be posting any new chapters for any of my stories for a while.


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